Life Advice That's Stuck With Me

I thought this would be fitting, seeing as I turn 30 very, very soon (in like a month ahhhhhh). This blog post is dedicated to the life advice that's stuck with me over the years. I'm not a fan of unsolicited advice, but sometimes people say things that really stick with you.

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Life Advice That's Stuck With Me (Over the Years)

• When you are struggling to take on other people's emotions, imagine that you have a rectangular glass box around you, so you don't absorb their emotions - From a university friend.

• "Just because you marry someone, don't expect them to change," - From a substitute teacher in high school.

• People are too worried about their own sh*t and how they look, to worry about you, and if they do worry about you, they probably won't remember it tomorrow - I think this was a combination of my Mum and me.

• "If you lend someone your pen for a minute, don't give them the lid. You'll always get your pen back," - Trusty ol' reddit.

• Be the person you needed growing up - I'm not sure where this came from.

• "If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room" - Confucius

• "Healthy arguments can be a good part of relationships, just not fighting" - I think this was my Dad.

• If you don't ask, the answer is always no.

• If you love someone, tell them. Love isn't just romantic or familial; it can also be platonic, so don't forget to tell your friends you love them, too.

• If you lend money, don't expect to get it back. A better way to tackle a situation like this is to give money as a gift.

• There aren't a lot of people who actually care about your well-being in the corporate world - a hard lesson I learned early on.

• How to create alternative thoughts and general CBT stuff from my psychologist.

• Setting boundaries is an important part of life.

• If you like doing a certain thing (e.g., music/dance/comedy) and spend more time around that, you get better at it - especially if you're bad at the start. This is my own advice, but I learned it when I would go to my friend's music gigs. I would be a terrible dancer, and then by the end of the year, they would compliment my dancing.

• Always listen to your gut.

• We don't always know what people are going through. Sometimes, people may be having a bad day and do something that we perceive as crappy to us, but we don't know what's happened to them prior.

• I read this on a Flipboard article somewhere, but it was like if someone says something that upsets you, you can always say, "That was hurtful. Was that intentional?" It gives them a way out without offending them. I also gave this to my psychologist, who wrote it down and really liked it.

• I used to hate the saying "When you know, you know," and I didn't really get it until I met Luke.

• Most of the time, things aren't about you, so don't sweat it.

• The worst time for women in ab*sive relationships are when they end.

• If you don't let other people help you when you need it, then how can they accept help when they need it?

• Don't take yourself too seriously; life's too short.

• When you're learning to drive, assume everyone else is an idiot on the road.

• If you are struggling to complete small daily tasks for whatever reason, e.g., maybe the depression kicks in or you have a chronic illness, doing something half-assed is better than not doing it at all. Like you don't have to scrub everything to perfection when cleaning, and if you can't focus on showering, have a body shower, and so on. I hope this one makes sense.

• I saw a YouTuber once who was struggling with negative self-talk, put up a childhood photo of themselves on their fridge and in their bathroom so that they would always see themselves, and it helped them talk less negatively towards themselves because you wouldn't say these things to a child.

• If you are looking to network or you want people to like you more, ask them lots of questions and keep self-talk to a minimum - the other person will go home thinking they had the best conversation of their life (but don't be manipulative).

• "Don't take criticism from someone you wouldn't take advice from" - I think I saw this on Buzzfeed.

• If it's going to take less than 5 minutes, do it straight away - I think this is from countless self-help books, but it's good advice. I try to follow it where I can.

• People like humility; it's okay not to know something. And it's even more okay to say "I don't know, I can find out".

• It's important to be silly and make life fun. Go out there and make magical memories.

Thanks for reading!

Ash x